HEY MATTIE ~ I'm a 27-year-old female, working as a cashier in TN. I've been playing There for years with the same partner.
My man, (name withheld), started playing Second Life about six months ago. I don't think he came here to have an affair, but he kept the same name. I came here looking for him, but I didn't keep the same name and I know where he is because of his picks. How do I get the spark back in our thing? And do I tell him who I am? ~ BEEN THERE
DEAR BEEN THERE ~ I wouldn't tell him. I'd be afraid he'd think I was insecure and that I was stalking him to find out the secrets he's been hiding from me.
There are several ways you can go about this. Obviously, you can approach him anonymously and try to "spark" a new relationship. But if he ditches the There you for the Second life you -- is it rejection? How would you deal with that mess? And what if he ditched you alltogether if he finds out the truth?
A wiser person than me would tell him the truth. At least the part about who you are. Then explain that you might like to get to know him in SL as well, hoping maybe you can find that thing together that you were missing in your real relationship.
All-in-all, I would wish you the best of luck in any approach you take. But the best solution tends to lie in openness and honesty, in my opinion, because when he sees that you can accept him for who he is, regardless of what he's done in the past, or what you've done in your past, he will love you more and you will grow to love him more yourself. ~ MATTIE SWAIN
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Labels: Cheating, unrequited love